If you’ve been put in charge of planning a funeral, organising a wake often will come hand in hand.

Although there’s no right or wrongs when it comes to a wake, we know this can be quite an emotional and daunting time. To help make this process as straightforward as possible for you we’ve created this helpful guide.

Read on to find out more about organising a wake and the different things you should take into consideration.

What is a wake?

Sometimes referred to as a funeral reception, a wake is typically a less formal, more relaxed gathering following a funeral or memorial service.

Historically a wake took place in the days leading up to the funeral with people watching and praying over the deceased day-in, day-out.

Although wakes originated as a religious ceremony, there is absolutely no expectation for a modern wake to have any religious ties or undertones. Instead, focus on your loved one’s own beliefs, their traditions and their culture.

A wake provides somewhere mourners can come together to remember the life of their loved one, sharing fond memories and stories with family, friends and other attendees.

Who should be invited?

This is completely up to you.

Some choose to have a private wake where only select people are invited – family and close friends for example. Whereas others choose to have a public wake.

If you choose to have a public wake, you can share the details in an obituary published beforehand and in the order of service to make people aware of the time and place.

Where should the wake take place?

Some people opt to hold the wake in their family home, however more popular venues include church halls, function rooms, pubs and golf clubs.

People may be travelling from afar to attend the funeral. So, when choosing a venue for the wake make sure to take in to account the distance from the funeral location.

You should also consider numbers and attendees’ needs. If you’re having a public wake, is the venue large enough to fit everyone in? Does it accommodate your guest’s accessibility requirements?

If you choose to hold the wake at an external venue, it’s worth speaking to the venue and asking questions. Remember, they’ve most likely held numerous wakes before, so are likely to make this process even easier for you by sharing their experiences.

What else should you consider?

Depending on your budget and the length of the wake, you may choose to provide food and drink for those attending. While your venue may be able to provide this, you could also source this yourself.

Although no one will expect entertainment, you may want to share memories in the form of photographs hung up around the venue. You could even ask attendees to bring along their favourite photograph of your loved one.

A memory book is always a nice touch. This can be passed around for people to share their thoughts in writing. Or you could leave cards around the venue, prompting people to share their memories on paper – these can then be collected and kept as a keepsake.

Who was your loved one’s favorite singer? Was there a genre of music they were particularly fond of? Incorporate this into the day, for a special touch.

Do you need to organise a wake?

Not all funerals are followed by a wake. Some people want to grieve in private, instead taking the time after the funeral to reflect alone or with their close family. Others plan a memorial event to take place at a later date, a tree planting ceremony for example.

In essence, a wake is a place people can pay respects to their loved ones in a safe, peaceful environment. Your loved one may have mentioned their preference, but if not then you should follow your gut and do what you think they would have wanted, capturing their personality and ultimately celebrating their life.

Get in touch today

The team at Brunel Funeral Directors are here to help you give your loved one the send-off most suited to them, providing guidance through this trying time. For more information, why not give us a call on 0117 374 2002 or email us admin@brunelfd.co.uk?